Dilemma

…so, as I was frantically trying to wrap the presents on Monday afternoon, I got a call from the daycare…It seems that another child had put his Nintendo DS down to charge and Matthew had picked it up and broken it – apparently an accident but inexplicably opened it too far and twisted it (and he knows better).  I frantically finished up and picked Matthew at the daycare.  He was understandably upset – I think there were a lot of people yelling at him (kids) and asking him why he had done that – and I didn’t help.  His latest behavior when he is feeling attacked is to suck on his thumb and cry.  So, we drove to Target with me getting myself under control and him not being able to even tell me who’s toy it was and what happened.  We picked up a new DS for the child and went back to the daycare and gave it to him and he was very gracious. 

…on the way back, I told Matthew that “if” he got a DSi for Christmas, he was going to have to give me it so I could return it to a store and get the money that I had just paid to replace his friends machine.  I don’t really think he understood that and then I started feeling bad.  this is the one toy he has been asking for – for about 6 months!  His other one broke early in the summer and I told him that I wasn’t going to buy another one for him – because he isn’t responsible enough with it. 

…for the last 6 months he has been talking about how he will take care of it if Santa brings him one.  And Santa has been listening.  But, these things are not “dollar” toys and I really don’t know if I need to teach him a lesson- cuz clearly he wasn’t gentle with his friends machine (which he wasn’t supposed to be touching anyway – but that is another thing we are working on). 

If I do take the toy, I want to make an impression on him – so am considering letting him open the present and then take it from him to “take back” to the store (and then give it to him for his birthday in August).  On the other hand, I don’t want to be mean – especially since Santa is giving Riley one too.  I could just not give it to him and tell him that Santa decided that he wasn’t quite ready to be responsible for one because he broke his friends (in which case I have these MP3 /video players that I got really inexpensively that I had decided to keep for birthdays or for our trip in April as a surprise and distraction for the plane ride) which I can give to him as a substitute and isn’t quite so easily destroyed – and which he would like because he loves music.  And finally, I could just give him the DSi (which honestly I am leaning toward) because he will be sooooo disappointed if he doesn’t get one and Riley does and because that breaks my heart.  So, any suggestions?

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Categories: Family, Money Sense, Mothering 4

2 replies

  1. Could Santa give it to him but leave a note that Mommy keeps it and he can play with it only under Mommy’s supervision until he can be trusted to treat it gently?

    Santa could also warn him that this is the LAST one he gets if he breaks it.

    Regards,
    Anne Marie (helpful elf?)

    Like

  2. I agree with Anne Marie’s suggestion. I definitely think you should give it to him, but emphasize that this is it, he needs to be more gentle with it because there are no more. The note from santa is a great idea. Maybe that will make an impression on him.
    I think it would be unfair not to give it to him since it was an accident.

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